Monday, September 24, 2012

Ma vie en rose

Ma vie en rose (French)
My Life in Pink (Translated in English)
1997 Belgian film
directed by Alain Berliner

Apart from the fact that the above film in French uses 'Pink' as a referrent to an ambiguous identity of an individual, (pulling from what associations the society has hooked on to the colour) it also makes these associations blurred. The protagonist of the film, the little boy Ludovic who is in his liminal stages of life where he begins to open up to the idea of sexuality, finds himself to relate to what generally the society understands as feminine traits. He likes to dress up in frocks, likes to make himself up and almost wants to feel like women until he is made to realize that it is not perfectly fine to do so.

We were made to watch the above film as a part of our French Theory class, where we were discussing Simon de Beauvoir's 'The Second Sex' and ideas of feminism. In the literature, SdB brings out the the construct of the 'woman', saying that a woman is made, a woman is a social construct. She goes on to analyse how the woman has been historically placed after the man, and gives a number of examples from historical references that have continued to affect the perception of the woman as the second sex. She uses psychoanalytic theories and goes on to open up cognition systems in children to question when a body realizes and becomes conscious of its biological exclusiveness.

I will put up some of our discussion in the class here, but to get back to the film, 'My Life in Pink' portrays a family struggling between allowing freedom for a body (biologically produced by it) to be like it wants to be versus what the society expects it to be. Ludovic's mother initially supports the boy's different behaviour. She feels it's a passing transient feeling for her child. Ludovic continues to engage with his feelings and goes on to develop a liking for his Father's boss's son who studies in his class. He openly expresses in his innocence, to his parents, that he would eventually get married to this boy.

In a society where roles of males and females are so strictly defined, the family gradually gets in to complications. Ludovic's father loses his job to his boss (who holds his own social position), who doesnot want to either accept his son's eccentric likings too. A blow on thier stomach, the mother realizes that her son's odd social behaviour is affecting far beyond what is just thought to be the issue of an individual body, and she expects it to be rectified. Thus, the psychologist is also involved to correct Ludovic's orientation issues.

There are several layers in the film and the prime one is that which raises questions that SdB raises of gender v/s sex. Ludovic, in the film has mixed up his biological identity with his social one. He is in those stages of life where he is just beginning to gain consciousness about his body and its realtionship to the world outside it. What initially seems to be an effortless assumption of his body turns out to be quite a complex reality for him. This reality pushes him to quietitude, seclusion and makes him introvert.

The film sensitively deals with the difficulties a body encounters while it constructs its identity. This identity for most of us is often socially and politically masked. The film questions this mask through innocent ignorance. It raises questions of whether we can really be free - to make choices for ourselves, since much of our self is already constructed before we gain consciousness.

 

Sunday, September 16, 2012

Times Square



Times Square, New York, where everything is moving. Facades of buildings merge in the sky and the ground seems to be unstable. People gaze around and sometimes find themselves embedded onto the screens. LEDs creep over tall buildings till they cover them up completely. You feel exploded into images, until you completely immerse into them, and become one of it...An absolutely ultimate space.

Animal Behaviours

An amazing squirrel crossing the road on the overhead electric cable. 
I see it many times.



The 8 week cat, my neighbour's pet. Absolutely adorable and cartoon-like.

Friday, September 14, 2012

Revisiting Student-hood

To become a student again after four years of graduating is a strange feeling. It's like a constant battle between the freedom one can take and the forces of institution that tie you down. This time, the feeling of being a student is a different one - something between the states of being confident and the underconfidence that you wish to fill up through your further study. As against the undergraduate study course where all is welcome and acceptable as a part of your learning, graduate studies are about foucsing, chanelling, tuning, fine tuning and sharpening your skills into one area for specialization. This process calls for a lot of discarding of what may be apparently interesting for you to know, but not necessary for you to learn. Thus, the probability of things you should be doing reduces.

On the other hand, being an 'alien' student in a distant country, I can now relate to experiences that students going to cities from small places for education undergo. I am sure that my present difficulty would help me appreicate and empathize with what outstation students undergo when they come to a new place, especially a city. The exprience of a city is overwhelming, since it gets you landed in an extremely complex web of rules, regulations and unfamiliarity at once. Inspite of the fact that I am not in a big city in US - infact I am in a very small town (not even a city) - I can feel the friction of unfamiliarity.

Unfamiliarity with history, culture and people; with systems, regulations and ethics of the place makes me quiet and feel secluded. Being a town, one doesnot see much activity here. And soon, when it becomes cold, streets will be laden with snow and there will be nothing to look out through my large window! The disconnect with a place due to your cultural roots being somewhere else can be distracting. My mind is preoccupied by thought of what can be done of this distance that I feel with this new culture. I generally try to fill this distance through writing and recording. In the recent days, I have found myself too distracted to record too...

And I absolutely dislike the fact that my experiences are following the trajectory of 'culture shock theory'. Where on one hand it comforts me, it also makes me feel quintessential...

But I am managing. Quiteness helps looking inwards. And perhaps it is one big aspect of learning.

Sunday, September 09, 2012

Waste around New Haven

Around New Haven, I always find people carrying packaging boxes that they may have just emptied off a new item. The dustbins of the city are full of these brown card board boxes. Even inside the buildings, the dustbins always have a lot of cardboard.

Packaging material here can be perpetually found lying on the streets. Such stuff tells differnt stories of the place. That people are constantly engaging in newer products. That perhaps people are constantly changing, and hence constantly buying new products. That the University is buying a lot of new product all the time. That packaging in the US is intensive...so on and so forth.

However, all this material never goes to any further use. The nature of garbage in New Haven is much different than what I would find in Indian cities. There are many times when people may walk up to a dustbin and pick up thigs from it. It's absolutely a normal practice to so it in the US. But what is also tells about this society is that it's limits of seeing the potential of 'material'. The inventive minds of India would try and use up much of all the material before it actually finds place in the garbage can.

For example, we save most of our packaging, often turning it into containers, cutting it for smaller things, selling it to the nearby raddi wala for some money -- in the process of which we mobilize a lot of things and ideas. It gives rise to a certain kind of culture and chain of entrepreneurs. There is no such dimension here. Social space is very flat, and further reduced by the ingress of computer and technology. Technology has made this place, to a large extent, physically immobile. And on the other hand, they crave for more and more speed. Thus landscapes are flat, and textures are plainer...