I have been in the US for two weeks and what people call 'the difference' is sinking in now. There are both - pros and cons of this difference which is what I am going to attempt noting down here. I have been wondering since the first week if I wanted to just 'travel' this new country or 'be here' for two years. Cultural adaptation becomes an important issue when you are going to spend a considerable amount of time in a new place - which means a new geography, new ethnography, new ethics and new climate. The constant struggle of rationalizing a future - or perhaps resolving a future creates further complication with the notion of cultural adaptation. What I essentially mean is that it may be as difficult to get into a culture as getting out of it. Meanwhile, this conflict has arisen between the culture that I assumably must leave behind and that which I am in geographically / ethnographically etc. There are simultaneously two aspects that I need to think of - my original roots and my new ground. If I remain in the middle, I would be losing out much of both the worlds - or at least that it what it seems right now.
In one's attempt to keep peace with both these worlds - there is a mental friction. In the beginning, this is pronounced since one is trying to catch up with two different time zones - and at the same time, switching between cultures while communicating, adjusting to accommodate both these worlds into the same time frame. Imagine being awake at the end of the day to talk back at home when your parents want to and being fresh yourself in the morning to attend to your work in the morning. Or vice versa. When you can not cope up these two worlds within a single time cycle, it creates irritation and frustration; making you feel inefficient. The comparison of this inefficiency with your recent past when you were able to manage much more in the given time makes you feel even worse. This coupled with a lot more activities that you need to balance yourself which were once taken care of by your family members makes you almost vulnerable.
Although, managing a lot more activities is an anticipated phenomena. A more crucial thing is the loss of friends, family or room mates with whom you can share these things. Some people are lucky to move in to a same course or program together with a known friend to a same country. Other people who like things harder make a choice like me - completely isolated from any familiarity. Building this new familiarity almost feels like responsibility. Otherwise, there is no social security or space that you look forward to. The construction of this social space is really important and essentially you do not know the limits of it - you therefore constantly try to limit it, often to just a single person or two. That may not always be healthy.
On the other side, there are beautiful things that you encounter too. Here, I would become more specific and talk about my experiences.
I never thought Mumbai - the place where I come from is such an important dot on the map. As soon as you introduce yourself as a resident of Mumbai, you can almost see a sparkle in their eye. Mumbai has perhaps become more popular because of Rahul Mehrotra being the Dean of Harvard's Urban Planning Department. However, as more and more students from western countries are being taken to India, Mumbai for studying urban space, I am generally able to find common ground to initiate a conversation. On the other hand, India still remains an exotic location for people to travel. My background in architecture and therefore knowing places helps in connecting further with people where I am generally familiar with Indian cities that they have visited. Talking about idiosyncratic ideas on India is interesting and I find it fascinating to know peoples' impressions of the East.
Architects are highly regarded here and that is another positive dimension. But in general, all people are highly respected, as long as they are involved in any kind of education. Since systems here are so liberal, many people also do not pursue education seriously.
Lastly, in an orientation, one of the speakers said a very sensitive thing: "You may think that back in your school, you were the best and you would always be amongst the top five; and in the initial semesters, your performance may go down. Many people take it as a challenge to their egos. But remember that you are in a University like Yale, and thus in a class of no. 1s from all across the world. So remind yourself that you are competing with the best of the best, and you are one of them. Don't prejudge. Give yourselves time."
And that quite sums up the feeling right now...
In one's attempt to keep peace with both these worlds - there is a mental friction. In the beginning, this is pronounced since one is trying to catch up with two different time zones - and at the same time, switching between cultures while communicating, adjusting to accommodate both these worlds into the same time frame. Imagine being awake at the end of the day to talk back at home when your parents want to and being fresh yourself in the morning to attend to your work in the morning. Or vice versa. When you can not cope up these two worlds within a single time cycle, it creates irritation and frustration; making you feel inefficient. The comparison of this inefficiency with your recent past when you were able to manage much more in the given time makes you feel even worse. This coupled with a lot more activities that you need to balance yourself which were once taken care of by your family members makes you almost vulnerable.
Although, managing a lot more activities is an anticipated phenomena. A more crucial thing is the loss of friends, family or room mates with whom you can share these things. Some people are lucky to move in to a same course or program together with a known friend to a same country. Other people who like things harder make a choice like me - completely isolated from any familiarity. Building this new familiarity almost feels like responsibility. Otherwise, there is no social security or space that you look forward to. The construction of this social space is really important and essentially you do not know the limits of it - you therefore constantly try to limit it, often to just a single person or two. That may not always be healthy.
On the other side, there are beautiful things that you encounter too. Here, I would become more specific and talk about my experiences.
I never thought Mumbai - the place where I come from is such an important dot on the map. As soon as you introduce yourself as a resident of Mumbai, you can almost see a sparkle in their eye. Mumbai has perhaps become more popular because of Rahul Mehrotra being the Dean of Harvard's Urban Planning Department. However, as more and more students from western countries are being taken to India, Mumbai for studying urban space, I am generally able to find common ground to initiate a conversation. On the other hand, India still remains an exotic location for people to travel. My background in architecture and therefore knowing places helps in connecting further with people where I am generally familiar with Indian cities that they have visited. Talking about idiosyncratic ideas on India is interesting and I find it fascinating to know peoples' impressions of the East.
Architects are highly regarded here and that is another positive dimension. But in general, all people are highly respected, as long as they are involved in any kind of education. Since systems here are so liberal, many people also do not pursue education seriously.
Lastly, in an orientation, one of the speakers said a very sensitive thing: "You may think that back in your school, you were the best and you would always be amongst the top five; and in the initial semesters, your performance may go down. Many people take it as a challenge to their egos. But remember that you are in a University like Yale, and thus in a class of no. 1s from all across the world. So remind yourself that you are competing with the best of the best, and you are one of them. Don't prejudge. Give yourselves time."
And that quite sums up the feeling right now...
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