Moods

Walking with wrong shoes

Last week has been emotionally drenching. This was primarily because I almost had to counsel parents with a host of their own problems with their wards. The first day, Atul and Adarkar Sir werent there at all. The second day, Atul was there for the rescue. However, although we had mentioned only 2 days on the Warning letters that we sent to the students, parents kept pouring in. Most of them came perhaps just to meet. Of those whom we really expected, very few came!

For parents, it's the colour. Red and black. That's the only point of distinction that they can make out.
"Why are there so many red marks?" - and most would even ignore if the difference was by a mark or 2, or if it was made red mistakenly. The question was only for the colour. There was hardly any concern for the future of the ward. All came with two binary assumptions: "He/she is too good to get it" or "Please help, this won't happen again".

भलाई का तोह ज़माना ही नहीं रहा!

No one would want their ward to stay back, even if they didnot perform well. Every one want them to get pushed! all of them! Reason is obvious: Money! Parents realize, but students don't. In the end, everyone gets pushed. The quintessential bharat ki janta: "कर लेगा अपना गुज़ारा".

Anyway, the pressing fact that I have realized is that most of the people here are in the wrong professions. And I feel worse for those who know that they don't want to do architecture and still are left with no other option. A student wanting to study medicine passionately, tried twice, but wasn't eligible (as per her score) for the stream! Another student who would want to do engineering has ended up in architecture. Some absolutely do not have the aptitude for architecture, and we still have to cope up with them. Its terrible. It's unethical/immoral to ask them to just leave. We know, they wouldnt suit this feild. But it's terrible to question their choice. I feel very sad to see them wasting their lives in the wrong profession. What is this education system which does not allow me to keep refining my choices as I mature with age? Who can know clearly what he/she wants to do at the age of 15? It's sick.

The correct age should be 20. We need that space to experiment with lives. In those tight 5 years, so many decisions are taken: the field, the specilization, the career, the future, the practice - all of it. And if it goes wrong, very few are left with any further choice. 25 you marry, 28 you have a family, and 30-40 is your "maximum gain" period. After 40 you are a generation. After 50 you have to retire! For a wrong decision, I wonder what life you live. Would a "family" give an individual an opportunity to re-do schooling once one finds a direction? Our context is a difficult one - may be there are exceptions too. But given the choice, how many would have the same rigour to pursue their interests? I always feel that I wouldn't be able to give my 100% for what I assumed I should have been doing 2 years ago.

Opportunity - my uncle regrets that inspite of having a tremendous aptitude, his place (then Bihar, now Jaharkhand) offered him absolutely no opportunity / outlet for expression of his talent. He has an immense cognitive understanding of things around him and has a full fleged mechanical workshop. However, he feels he would have been a different person altogether if he got a chance may be to study in a city, or to talk to intelligent people around him or if he only had the means to go out. 3 years ago, when I told him my thesis topic - he had the same smile (a cynical, poetic, smirk), that I would expect from anyone - "अंधों का सिनेमा" - "Cinema for the blind". I felt deeply satisfied to talk to him. He was the first person after perhaps only Prasad Shetty to share that sense of the project. I tremendously appreciate his optimism in a situation that I would end up in a "life is a b****" statement. Why should it happen to any one? WHY? He feels helpless for his children. And once the age passes by, the children lose enthusiasm too. Today, my cousins have just accepted it as a fact of their life.

There are things that would be too personal to write here. But I would never like to face them as a teacher. Rather, why should I be counselling parents with all their gamut of personal problems? I am here to teach, and learn. Does this happen elsewhere? Or am I looking at ideal conditions where students bear their own responsibility?

But I know what frame of mind students live in: "College time is to enjoy." When my friends forced me to skip classes, I could only think: "But I enjoy learning..." And not that I have less exciting memories of my college life!

Naah, I had no intentions to win a gold medal or a national award. I loved what I did. I could never submit a badly worked sheet: but hold on - I was willing to be marked in the negative for it, in case I submitted it late. Anyway, why am I even putting all that here? May be because I have never purged it out to anyone! But all this is inconsequential.

I just keep reminding myself, that I have to work and grow. That's it. And why should I compare my student life with my students' life - there's no logic. I am different. And they are different. There are no mirrors in here.

So today the head announces, that let us push them...they will do good in life... there goes the joyride. And as I butcher my own principles, I told myself, "Anuj, the world is a cinema for the blind, why do you want to see?"

Anyway, I would elaborate in another post what constructs my idealism. That will be an interesting one isn't it?

Colourfulcat

drawing by Sonal Sundarrajan

I have always loved Sonal's sense of representation. Last week she was in Delhi and I assume that she must still be in the memories of the place when she made this drawing. In recollecting Delhi, she constructs her ground plane by dividing the canvas through the radial grid - the first thing a planner would think of while describing Delhi, perhaps. And the green heavily suggests the gardens and the green cover that Delhi is capped / covered with. I have always been jealous of the fact that Delhi has the luxury to spread, unlike Mumbai, where we keep on imploding. The smaller buildings sprinkled around are almost become iconic in the drawing - like that in the real space of Delhi. One could identify the High court, and the neo classical orders which characterise the iconic buildings. And all of them are off the ground plane - toppling off - does that represent the state of affairs right now, or is it the artist's language, one could debate. But the allegory that it (unknowingly?) suggests is interesting.

To talk about suggestion, the main object in the building has been playfully detailed. The ground storey is pulled up with its semicircular arches, and thus it almost appears to be a cage. Who is trapped? In what? one wonders. The upper storey draws its edges from the Red Fort, but has been painted pink. What does it mean for the 'red' fort to fade into 'pink'? The pink tessellations on the remaining body reminds of multiple ideas, fragmented - in all scales - right till the paver blocks.

But in the end, the drawing celebrates the mood of the space - festive flags, state of mess, embroiled wires and bright colours bring out a new enthusiasm. And I would only assume the position of the little black dog that standing opposite to this 'colourfulcat', alone in a green patch wondering what I wonder is logical...

Any Takers? - 2

This post is a continuation of my earlier post on pedagogy:

Constructive Imposition Policies:

In our quest to improve students' vocabulary, we had started taking dication tests before beginning our Architectural Design classes. To our surprise, not even a single student scored 100% marks in any of the tests. To ensure maximum attention and response, we randomly came up with this idea that who ever scored well (maximum) could avail those points for upgrading their attendance. Since this was a completely out of the curriculum initiative, we thought that students who lost out on their attendance because they came in late, etc. would be prompted to perform well to avail their lost attendance. 75% attendance is mandatory to be able to appear for any University exam. Thus, I thought of tying up both issues making it more constructive. Although there is no sense of imposition here, it definitely is a constructive technique. On the other hand, impositions like coordinating archival works from students, photographing projects and events, etc. could help generating our own documentation instead of giving re-dos and disallowing students to sit for lectures.

Faculty Exchange Sessions:

To align with various levels of study in the school, constant exchange of ideas is important. The visiting faculty seldom is able to interact with other classes/teachers. This can be initiated by exchanging faculties between different classes for smaller sessions, eskis, discussions, etc.

Vertical Studios:

The idea of a 2-3-week intensive vertical studio is an interesting one. Although it has been experimented already, it was highly unstructured and unplanned. Better planned vertical studios can become breeding grounds for telescopic ideas of what students would eventually like to do. It can become a great platform for interactions with people and developing all round skills.

Joint Jury:

An initiative already experimented, I think it must be taken forward. However, it has to be a week long process, such that all attend all. There is no point in rushing it over one day. Although students may not be interested, it definitely is an important ground for faculties to look at loopholes in design programmes and an overall curriculum-building.

Exchange Programme:

For a student, it is important at the later years of college to distance himself/herself from their institution to be able to critically assess the skills they have learnt. Going out to a different environment is important to gauge the level at which a school is operating. Learning from different contexts is extremely important and making networks outside our circle of friends in crucial in personal development.

Himal / Himalaya

Based on my Visual Culture class, I am trying to do an experiment here with the way maps are represented. We spoke about politics of representation, Euro-centric world map, politics of mapping in our class.

And for a long time I was searching for this upside down map of the world, which I could finally source from here:

I am wondering why Himal Map is called so. On a wild and obvious guess, I present one of the immediate images that google displays on keywords "Himal Map":

Is the reference to the Himalayas (the crest referring to the new figure of the map?). Seems interesting. Errrr, but the real reason is this. Anyway, I think it may be an interesting coincidence for HIMALaya crests to look like the Himal Map of India.

At Kanchanjunga

Palghar

We went to Palghar over the weekend (2nd year students and faculty). However, I guess we were closer to Kelve. Spent some time in peaceful places, cool shadows and timber buildings.

I think i kept harassing the students forcing them to work. Although they visited the same places last year apparently, no one knows where they lost all the documentation work of these places done by them. Anyway, we looked at the buildings more closely. I had to constantly feed in techniques of measuring things. I had strictly instructed the students not to get camera. So there was no drama of photo sessions. Inspite of that, I do not think they observed. Neither did they see. They kept missing some of the key things to take note of.

The gujju gang kept themselves busy with periodical eating rounds. I wondered if there was nothing else that the space prompted them to do. No one discussed anything about space (perhaps because they had already been there last year).

Visiting Mahendra Kale's office, I felt reassured about my decision to stay away from architectural practice for a while. I wondered if he felt conscious of me being around while he explained the structural concepts to students. Anyway, it was really nice of him to have arranged the entire visit for us.

Teen Turmoils

In my quest to help students, sometimes, I overspend my time on them. I don't realize how much time I put into them without any knowledge of what it would manifest into? And it is so difficult to take the role of a counselor. The last stage of the teen age is the most perplexing, most difficult - because you have to decide and take a stand for yourself. I too was so confused at this point of time in my life. I didnot know what was my calling. I wanted to leave architecture, not knowing what I would do...

But I stayed on, precisely because I didnot know what I would do? And another year passed. Over this year, I just spent time in drawings - making just immaculate drawings. Rotrings - I almost fell in love with them. I would spend a lot of time in the library - looking at old, really old books, looking at drawings. Unfortunately, we did not even have faculty who could excite us with our work. Mundane people - clumsy faces... Same old sheets. What else would one do? I kept looking at books, buildings - just tracing them - without knowing why. I didnt even know how to look at books - what to understand out of it! At that time, it was only drawing to the rescue. This is when my performance dropped.

Fourth year cracked because of Prasad Shetty - and I still remember one question he asked while discussing 'histories" in Research Methods class: "Is your grandfather not important?". This invoked a whole new sense of interest in myself. That is where it started...I used to go after classes and ask him one line questions - on generalizations, on opinions. He would say "But these generalizations are not coming from nowhere." And I spent my time only in analyzing these statements he made. Thats all. He would never give answers. He still never gives answers.

But at this point of time in my life, I met some key people: Madhumita Nandi, Ateya and others. A whole new explorations took place. But going back to this confusion, Ateya once told me: "Look at people whom you like - what path did they follow, do you want to be like them?" And it was all about finding the right people and the right paths then. It gave a lot of food for observation and thought. Life seems different now, where I am out of that state of haze. But I can relate to students who feel lost. And it is in such cases having ideal people become important. Having role models become important. Ofcourse, I may have said earlier that in being 'like' someone, we lose ourselves, but we need to be like someone also to know whom we dont want to be like. Being neutral is unproductive. And especially in this world, being unproductive is senseless.

But I dont even know whether whatever I speak to students makes sense to them. Or does it help them. And what if I misguide them by mistake, or what if they misinterpret me? I am too cynical sometimes, and I dont know if those who trust me, too get influenced. That is not something I ever intend to do. I dont know how cynicism or sarcasm affects students. But that has become a part of me. I just feel sorry for too many people experiencing the same old difficulties and insecurities of life. So I just try to listen to them. And there are times when I avoid them - because I dont know if i have a role to play really. Who am I?

Sometimes I feel so many of them are wasting their potentials, but it's their choice. Sometimes I also feel that students take undue advantage of the time I spend with them. I know all that - but I just try dont let it bother me in the 'benefit of doubt' principle - that it's their loss if they do so. But I dont know how this immense problem of not being able to cope up with the field / study of architecture can be more subtle.

I guess eventually people find their way. Just that it must not be too late. Otherwise, being cynical again, I think life is a b****. Life is the step mother of time I guess. Or vice versa. Anyway, whats the point of going into that kind of negativity.

As Dushyant and I would conclude: What is, is is.

(and I don't know how many times I have use don't in the post and I don't want to use more don'ts - what else do you do with language, anyway!)

First Year AD Jury: Expression Spaces

I myself waited with this project and made my fellow faculty wait for a long time before the final jury could be taken. It was because I was not satisfied with the amount of time the students spent in their process of evolving their design. However, the final jury for the 3rd project of the first year students, I felt, had much more content than discussed in the session.

The project was about making and expression space of a professional (profession) by deriving patterns out of their working conditions (behavioural, habitual, through their objects they use or deal in, etc.). We chose 40 professions to begin with - a variety of them - from the vada pav seller, dabbawala to the Chartered Accountant or the Dancer. To limit the scale/scope of the project for the first year, we restricted the area to 50 sq m. I shall be writing a formal "retrospect" brief for this project later.

Each design had so much potential, and each designer had so much enthusiasm. And so I too got enthused. The above sketches were made as I thought along with the students. Of a postman, a space in the wells of the staircase ringing door bells and looking into interiors of houses framed through keyholes and cut-outs in safety doors, of a barber - looking at multiple hairstyles, almost living in hair. For an astronaut, we thought of the ground plane, which is never flat - rather someone who spent time in undefined plane. So the undulating surface enclosed in a space which would be under constant air pressure. However, the student took a complete different trajectory and made something like pneumatic slabs. He lifted this inhabitable expressive space a feet above the ground, thus it being in space (ungrounded) while the user entered or left the space.

For the tailor, we began with the idea of playing between the 3 critical numbers: shoulders-chest-waist. These numbers define the body and in turn, the garment. The idea could have been abstracted into a series of such hangers sized to people. However, the idea was lost. The pattern in the fisherman's profession was seen to be a daily passage between solid ground to the non-ground. This pattern of transition between surfaces that the fisherman inhabits was what we tried to explore. The idea was abstracted through the symbolic net, which becomes a surface to walk as well as envelop. The movement it induces in the body is similar to the movement from land to sea (and vice versa) by cleverly spacing the structural members of the support. I am not sure if the student brought out this aspect clearly. There was perhaps a little conceptual misunderstanding.

A rigorous process followed for the dabbawala - of analysing the codes on the dabbas to evolving it into a spatial configuration. This was truly the most fascinating project in the class. Others were that of the joker, achieved through the act of juggling, and completely colourful while another interesting one was the magician, where I tried to crack the idea of anti-pattern (that a magician works with). Although it was a tricky profession, if there was a little more rigour in the project, it would have worked brilliantly. But theorizing the whole idea of magic for architectural space was something that I enjoyed in my mind. I didnot discuss it with the student since it would make no sense to her. So I kept myself low-key.

I think the students got an idea of anthropometrics and the process of evolution of space. Since the first two projects were too exploratory in terms of form, we consciously kept this one as an exercise for evolving space. Now, we need to introduce them to function, while the students need to learn how to communicate their designs ideas through their work.

photo titles in order (expression spaces of):

bus conductor

priest

magician

bus conductor

dietician

dermatologist

astronaut

Raag based item songs...

Sitting back and pondering over music, it occurred to me that some of the most raunchy songs in Bollywood are based purely on Indian Classical Ragas. Here are some:

Dhak Dhak Karne Laga, Beta

Raag Shivranjani

Sunta Hai Mera Khuda, Pukar

Raag Bhairav

Tu cheez badi hai mast mast, Mohra

Raag Bhimpalaas

Hai Rama yeh Kya Hua, Rangeela

Raag Poorvi

Is Pyaar ko main kya naam doon, Mujhe kuch kehna Hai

Raag Shivranjani

will add more if i get more. I have detailed writings to write on music. dont know how to put it down. Anyways. lets see...